The road was long and grueling. We had a guy that wanted to look at it twice before going with another apartment. We had two people set up a time to see it and never showed. We had Eviction Guy, whose bright friend walked into the only other room besides the living room in a five hundred square foot apartment and ask, "is this the bedroom?" We had one guy who couldn't find the unit, so he knocked on the door of both neighboring units before going to downstairs to knock on doors down there. It's been a hoot.
If anyone might be in the market for a sub-lease, here are a few pointers:
- Show up when you say you will.
- Don't ask for a ride. You unconscionable deadbeat.
- If you think you might forget it, write down the unit number of the apartment.
- If the add says they are looking for someone to take the apartment for the full year, don't show up, tour the facility, and say, "I like it, but I only need it until December."
- Don't respond with an email that says: "I need the place for two weeks. Is it furnished? Is there internet?" You unbelievable scumbag.
- Don't set up a time to see the apartment, then when the current tenant sends you a confirmation email the morning of, wait two days to respond with, "Hey, I just got home from work and didn't see your email..." You aren't a fireman. You weren't at work for two days.
- Bathe. Why is this even an issue?
- Wear clothes that don't smell. This is a business transaction.
- Most importantly: if you have any questions, re-read the ad before asking them. Your question has already been answered.
That's all.
Ainers and I would like to express our heartfelt appreciation to University Group for their hospitality and generosity during our first month in Champaign.
God have mercy on your unethical, slumlording souls.
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